one method for...

Here's a poem/thing I came up with tonight after finding a list of words. The words were written out one day when I wanted to get thoughts onto paper quickly and without much development. As it stands, the poem's probably too long and wordy right now, but I wanted to see what you all said about it.

Also, tonight I was angry... hence the poem:

ONE METHOD FOR LOSING ANGER

The word series may go like this:

(but first, because you must,
pound your fist against the shower wall)

: shit : damn : saliva : monastery : Greek : P. : paint : acid-reflux : pink : hot : music : leopard : outside : silhouette : doctor : photo : booth : location : pneumonia : drum : beat : line : baton : twirl : mother : K. : the same : twin : brown : Hayden : Hades :

and the interpretation, this way:

(beat it out, vomit up the anger any way you can without hurting
yourself or anything else—discreetly)

: : expletives help resurrect the soul from its stuttering state;
additionally, in the brain there exists a special place for the expression of such words
and only this place works properly in dire times, when ordered thinking isn’t possible
: saliva also works in times like this;
if you lean your head against a pillow and let your mind scurry, pretty soon
this will trickle out soundlessly
: possibly the only place where people can keep quietly depressed without interference—
here you can think; behind stone walls; a ledge over ocean: captive
: again, sea rolls about here; these islands captivate you
: you haven’t read Homer’s Iliad or Odyssey, yet your friend P. says:
don’t forget Ovid’s Metamorphosis
: because it starts with the right letter; is also an art
: even a little vomit in the throat never fails to remind you of color—
acid orange, acid brown, acid—
: pink—grapefruit; not to mention the color vest worn by P. in your dream
: wasn’t it hot?
: also in your dream, P. played viola; you never knew he played at all
: another thing about P.’s outfit: spotted yellow, like leopard-print;
and with remembering, things rarely follow chronology
: that kind of animal wouldn’t keep inside, of course
: running so fast, you’d see their blurry silhouette in shadows; close to a cheetah;
as a kid, this was what you pretended to be
: or this and a doctor; what else can you do
when your dad offers white lab-coats as Christmas gifts?
: slip one on and say cheese
: slip in here and say cheese
: the place, naturally
: your guess—as good as mine;
besides, you caught this once and coughed a lot
: the rattling in your chest might as well have been a snare
: what, besides beat, can they do for you?
: drum lines can be quite captivating
: : more so than baton-twirlers
: your mother remembering high school
: : she teaches your sister, K., the same
: K. slept in this bed next to yours, after mom took the bunks down
: P.’s bald, but this is the color of your sister’s hair; also end-rhymes with the last line
: the poet Robert Hayden without the recognition he did earn;
people paid this color too much attention
: what should be the end, or where you’d like the source to have gone; but—

shit—you remember : it starts again.

--
What do you think about cutting everything after the line "-slip in here and say 'cheese.'" (as well as the list of words after "booth") and then adding this as a last line:

happy now? or just pretending? ?

Please let me know if you have any thoughts on it. Thanks!