I tried, applied, now I leave no place for regret.

This morning I turned in my creative writing application after having spent most of yesterday and days prior working on it. I need to thank Nora especially for all of the help, encouragement and time she put into helping me with my poems, during which she didn't even complain. She's a dedicated friend.

I keep feeling overwhelmingly blessed by the friends I have in my life right now. My small group is amazing and I leave it on Mondays overflowing with the knowledge that people care about me and all the stuff that goes on in my life. I wish I could adequately express my appreciation for these friends and for how God keeps putting people in my life and reminding me that I matter to Him and to people. How refreshing it is to think about this.

But the real reason I started this post was just to say that I'm pleased with how my poems turned out and with the portfolio / writing sample that I admitted with my application for the CW program. It helped that I wasn't looking at my poetry all by myself and that I could get someone else's feedback, but I don't feel like my poems were merely mediocre (I had been working under the fear of mediocrity for the past couple weeks). I still don't expect to be admitted to the program--and I certainly won't unless God wants it to happen--given the number of people who apply and the number they accept, but I know that I've tried my hardest. That's all that really matters for anything, in my opinion.

I wanted to try because I didn't want to regret that I hadn't. I think this has been a theme in my life lately: I tried out the School of Education and decided that it wasn't for me. I applied for this... and currently await the outcome. And I continue to think about graduate school and poetics and think that if I don't try, then I will never let myself go for it. Hmm... but that's still ahead. Now only a forethought. Who knows what God can do and will do in the mean time. Wherever he takes me will be where I'm meant to be.