first draft friending poem
Any interpretations? Thoughts on this new poem / draft?
FRIENDING, HERE AND THERE
Free-loan bike, whose purple pink-seat,
whose sweaty glitter-basket let me
alone for months to stream-in campus.
Generous lender trusted me to friend her.
I was not so friendly, still, sitting
silent in the park, wishing my tongue would
work its magic, sailing over words
in accents, less American than surprising.
Hand-picked me a Strauss, a window-bouquet,
to set on streak-cleaned desk, shifted
into crawly web corner.
We sunk upon embroidered sheets,
where sleepless David wrote a psalm,
I slept in wakeful stares at corners,
thought of our burnt pancakes, butter-syrup,
place-mats quilted in place for surprise.
Love was not this headphone presence,
helloing, goodbying, blistering into late-night wind.
Love was not a bicycle starving in basement dark,
but strapped to the porch, whistling.
FRIENDING, HERE AND THERE
Free-loan bike, whose purple pink-seat,
whose sweaty glitter-basket let me
alone for months to stream-in campus.
Generous lender trusted me to friend her.
I was not so friendly, still, sitting
silent in the park, wishing my tongue would
work its magic, sailing over words
in accents, less American than surprising.
Hand-picked me a Strauss, a window-bouquet,
to set on streak-cleaned desk, shifted
into crawly web corner.
We sunk upon embroidered sheets,
where sleepless David wrote a psalm,
I slept in wakeful stares at corners,
thought of our burnt pancakes, butter-syrup,
place-mats quilted in place for surprise.
Love was not this headphone presence,
helloing, goodbying, blistering into late-night wind.
Love was not a bicycle starving in basement dark,
but strapped to the porch, whistling.

6 Comments:
Is there a third person besides the poet and bicycle? Sorry, I'm just not very good at picking up stuff...
By
Megumi, At
9:50 AM
yeah, there is also the "lender" mentioned in the first stanza... and maybe someone else, depending on how you read the poem... the "we" is meant to be more than one person--more than the poet alone
By
B-Go, At
11:27 PM
oh, also "sleepless David" is in here.
better make some coffee!
By
B-Go, At
8:41 AM
wow i loved this! i just loved it! i have no idea why, but the way you use words is just awesome. my heart leaped inside just reading. ;)
By
strunny, At
6:56 PM
for me poetry is still about understanding.. everytime I read this i hear something new, another piece of the puzzle is discovered, i want to keep reading.
And you make me want to write something... so you inspire me. SAG
By
Anonymous, At
9:26 PM
Yay! That's encouraging!
By
B-Go, At
9:58 AM
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